I do many different photos – aviation, railways, heritage buildings, scenic, atmospheric, nature and people. I also do animals – especially pets. This story is sadly not a happy story and it is difficult to share as it is just so recent with raw with emotions im still trying to manage.
It is a story of the death of our much loved family dog this week – Shadow.
A LOOK BACK ON A DOG’S LIFE
This has been written only a few hours after a sudden death of our beautiful “Shadow”. It is an attempt to recall the life she lived and to reflect back on her 12 years spent with the family. She was a wonderful dog who lived a long, active and exciting life. She was one of the world’s great dogs.
Her decline started sadly with a neck injury last August 2014 that was extremely difficult to heal and made her future ongoing life difficult. Shadow was also having to handle painful arthritis. Combined these 2 conditions made the last 8 months of her life quite difficult for her at times but she loved her life, and especially loved having her *medicines/drugs* delivered hidden in balls of delicious chicken mince…
Sadly something changed and 2 weeks ago she started to be *different* and to not like most of her food – having only very small and not many bits of biscuits or meat compared to her regular handfuls a day. After many days of non eating this outcome was concerning and it lead to a blood test. The results were a gut wretching diagnosis on Thursday 23 April 2015 of acute kidney failure, pancreatitis and thyroid problems.
We had no choice but to have the vet, who knew her well, to come to her home and put her into her final sleep…….Shadow was a wonderful dog who lived a long, active and exciting life. She was very fortunate as her story will show to have made it to just over 14 years of age.
THE EARLY DAYS – A RESCUE DOG
Estimated to have been born in 2001 she was suspected to have had some abuse in her background. A lot of odd things distressed her abnormally. We got her from the RSPCA in late 2003.
She was stick thin and was so anxious that she did not eat for 5 days and only ate then when offered an illegal Tim Tam. After that ….she was fine. This turning point was where she developed her lifelong taste for chocolate it seems…
We had brought her as a replacement after our dog “Patch” – who was a Kelpie/Shepherd cross who suddenly died early one morning on 20 August 2000. Patch had a wonderful nature, was easily trained, easy going/playful, loyal, protective, loved by many and overall a very alert and smart dog. She was the neighbourhood pet and went to every party and BBQ.
She was a hard act to follow but “Shadow” did just that…….and more. Shadow was extremely overjoyed that we rescued her from the RSPCA kennel. She developed a fast bond to humans who treated her well. Some of the earliest photos of her can be seen here in this section. She was very thin but already loved her new people.
As she learnt that we would treat her well ….she got her appetite for food back and started to regain her lost kilos. She was small/medium at this stage. She looked much more like the whippet part of her nature. By the time she died she had the chunky look of a well cared for cattle dog.
Early days in late 2003/early 2004 of her arrival at home… she was liking “foods” as shown by this 2 photos – also note again how thin she was here…
HOUSE WORK, WORKING and TRICKS
As a similarly smart type of dog as Patch, Shadow also was easily trained to do many things. She quickly learnt the connections between spelt out words eg F-O-O-D…..versus full words. She learned useful things eg BRING BLUE SNEAKER FROM THE BED ROOM . For success she was given dry cat food as reward. She learned fast !!
Through ongoing training Shadow eventually could spell and understand lots of specific words and their direct meaning such as – bath/washing, car ride, food, scraps, mail, boy, bus, food, shopping, clothes, sneakers, shoes, socks, push in/ push doors and many more……
We could ask her to spell her name and she would bark at each letter as we worked through the name.. S-H-A-D-O-W.
This training resulted in sometime a “monster” as she was too smart…and clued in for food rewards. Up until her last few weeks of her long life, she was able to learn new tricks very easily. She was very mentally active and alert right to the end. She managed to yell to the mailman motor bike one last time as she delivered mail and to ask for a share of Mums Anzac biscuit.
She maybe the only dog in Australia who died the day before Anzac day with Anzac biscuit in her stomach.
More examples of her skills included
- fetch the mail from the postman or least from mailbox as needed,
- doing a “beg pose” with her front paws while sitting up on her rear legs,
- she could count numbers from 1-10+ by barking and also by tapping with her paws,
- she could raise her paws for a “high 5″.
- she would each time we had a newspaper delivered run down driveway bring it back,fetch the next one and then wait for her payments.
- she could tell when she would have to sit in back seat of car for her own safety and when she could sit in front seat.
- she would go around pushing in keyboards, draws, doors , anything that opened and shut as she was fascinated by the movements.
- her ability to “hear” noises such as when i would return home from work or a trip around country was always amazing as she knew the timing of my coming home or the car engine by mere noise type. She had fabulous hearing and could differentiate the sound of certain things and people. She knew what time I was supposed to get in from work and would be looking out for me and listen for the bus noise or my footsteps.
- She knew at 4-5pm it was a walk time and would gives us clues to take her out.
- she knew when it was dinner….. to go to kitchen and wait…or if we were late to cook…..start begging
- she knew to go to specific bedrooms and find people or items
- she knew if we said .. “call XX ” she would go racing and bark get their attention and lead them to the other person.
- when stuck outside either front back or side doors, she would bark until we would open them and let her in.
- she would know difference between front and back yards words…which was always good to know.
- she had the ability to understand also if she barking too loud, we would say …..”softer” and she would bark quieter….
- she disliked the word “vaccuming”…. as the machine was a noisy object to her. She would immediately start barking at the mere mention of the word. She wanted to kill and eat the wheels of the vaccum and any lawn mower.
- she learned to “talk”… she would whine /communicate to us and over time it would be very pleasant and funny as she would sometime go on for 5-10mins chattering away about what she wanted us to do .
- at night time she would be given a bedtime biscuit handful and this came from a tin. The tin would be positioned so she knew where it was …….eventually — just even pointing in the direction of the tin she knew it was time for biscuits…….and some night we wouldnt have to even mention bedtime biscuits but merely say what time is it now and she would start whining for her biscuits. A later development saw her tap the tin lid for the biscuits and a handful be given to her and then she tap lid again and another handful of biscuit would appear.. she came very ….very clued in on this.
- she would give people “kisses” when asked and would lick their face or ears. It was very well developed routine by end of her life… when asked for a kiss she would do so.
- Shadow also knew that Monday nights meant rubbish bin night and she would go happy and get top have a walk up street as a result.
- she was also knew the road rules and would stop at gutters and wait for us when walking. She would wait until cars went roaring past and then cross with her person.
Not only could she do these things BUT she knew what to do when be told to go from a lounge room to go to a specific bedroom, find a specific type of shoe eg sneaker, sandle or office shoe and bring back the exact colour we wanted. She always did *pick up* for my mother if something was dropped on the floor. She picked up and handed the object to her.
She knew when she did “work” she was entitled to an instant payment of cat biscuits. It had to be paid instantly….she did not allow credit ! . It became her trademark working signature.
TRAVELS
She travelled around Sydney up to northern beaches, Gosford, southern Sydney and western Sydney in the car . She sometimes travelled around NSW …….. but not too often. That was a pity as she loved to get out and sniff and look at new places.
Shadow is seen below in 2005 enjoying a drive down to Canberra. Her expression says it all.. “i love this ride”.
Being a dog, she enjoyed going places to exercise and stretch her legs, meet new people and just have a good sniff. She loved parks, dog parks, walking around streets at daytime and night times and being out and about anywhere. She had some bad experiences at the local off leash dog park early in the piece and it was not til the last few years of her life that she liked to meet and greet other dogs. She loved little kids and welcomed their friendship at the local park.
Here we see her experiences from a trip in 2009 to a dog beach in northern Sydney.
Riding again in the car around Sydney in 2011 ….very happy she was on this day.
Walking local streets, parks and trails was another of her favourite things to do every day ideally at morning and afternoon and night time before bedtime. She would enjoy very much to run with me up and down a local street each night keeping up with me at a fast pace. As a result she developed good running skills in her younger days. Whenever ever out and about, Shadow would be sniffing, watching and examining objects or bushes besides wondering what were people doing…
Here she is being observant and watching the cars leave the street behind her.
Seen here in 2007 having a trip to Central Coast. On left view, she was partially leaning out the window of the car window …curious to see where I went and was watching me ….. I was photoing some aircraft at an airport.
Here she is in late December 2009 with me at Gosford again enjoying a day out checking out different places – this time a wharf.
PHOTO DOG
In her early years she would love to pose for photos and enjoyed it but in the last few years when a camera came out…… she would sometimes appear “shy” and turn her head away from the camera….and sometimes would refuse to even listen to me to look at the camera. It is sad that I didnt take enough photos of her from 2003-2008 to record more of her life.
HOME LIFE
She had total run of the house. She had 3 bed places with mats, sheets and many pillows but mostly slept on my mothers bed. She was always well comfortable!.
Despite having a full water bowl nearby she would follow my mother to the shower and drink the warm running water with her nose poked under the shower curtain.
In winter times, Shadow would love to sit cuddled up under blankets on beds or on chairs/lounges. She had heaps of her own special blankets. She used to love attention such as scratching/patting in winter as it kept her warmer.Winter days she just loved to sit in the sun in the early mornings soaking up the warmth thro her fur. She would do this a lot in early spring/early autumn as she obviously enjoyed the sun on a cool day.
She did not like hot summers or the extreme heat found in Sydney and panted and drunk a lot of water.
She was bit funny at times when showers when being had and she would proceed to come into shower and drink water off the shower floor…….. despite having a full water bowl nearby.
Here we see her tucked on on bed watching a movie on the laptop.
She also liked chairs to sit in.
When having a scratching of her stomach or fur, she would ask for more scratching when it stopped ……..by raising her paws as a sign to restart it…. we humans would comply with her simple request.
She would like to chase me around yard or driveways if i teased her. Here we see her chasing me and being a playful dog.
She loved to cuddle up on bed trying to take over at least 75-80% of bed spaces. And when it thundered/rained she would hide under bed.. which was a problem ….as her back and legs would be sprained by her twisting her body to fit under or when she climbed out.
Whenever we said were going in the car, her ears would prick up with a reaction and she knew it meant maybe a car ride for her could be gained. Sometimes she had to stay home and she would rush back to her bed or mat and lie down… somewhat unhappy she wasn’t going out.
She loved going on car rides to the local shops as she knew this was where her food came from.. in plastic bags or was wrapped up in plastic etc. She would watch us go shopping and sit waiting in car and then watch as we come near car and beg for something to eat.
She liked ..loved taking best places in best using pillows to lie down and rest as shown her in 2010.
When leaving the house, her favourite trips in car would be to MacDonald’s for a small ice cream.
Only once did she get a whole ice cream. Usually she got the last 5mm or so of the cone with cream in it. She was meant to be on a low fat diet because of her pancreatitis in the past. Being hungry or having her strong desire for ice creams, she would remind us with a nudge and tap on a shoulder to either person in front seats of the car and this was the signal it was time for her part of the ice cream cones….and we would comply with her request.
FAVOURITE FOODS
Besides the mundane doggie biscuits, dog meat and water, she would have a bit of a diet covering tea, milk, bread, pasta, vegetables, tastes of ice creams, fish, chips and some of this may have not been good for her but was given in moderation to keep her pancreas ok. In the last few years of her life she gained a big interest in eating the carrot skins off peeled carrots every .
She knew where kitchens in houses were and would follow for foods and wait…….
She would adore hearing food being cooked and come into the kitchen and watch and wait….hoping for a scrap.
When meals were finished by the humans in the house, she would often get any left overs …..with a ding ding of fork on bowl she would come running up stairs or rushing over and wait for the word of “you may have it….. ok”… and off she would go eating the scraps.
Eventually the mere mention of “scraps” or spelled out as s-c-r-a-p-s would result in her begging…and we complying once again with her request. Below is her having some rice scraps.
At other times, we would ask her also do a beg pose or bark for request for more foods …which she did only too complying and we then would hand the food scraps over to her as a reward for doing the trick.
At times we would buy chocolate and once in car or at home,…if she was near we would mention word “chocolate”…..and Shadow would go “mad” with joy!…. Shadow hear the wrapper crinkling and then rush over watch intensely any type of lolly or chocolate bar wrappers. She would demand we give some of whatever it was…which we had to at times…..so she often got a tiny touch of chocolate this way which helped manage her cravings for chocolate.
HEALTH ISSUES
Her health had some very very dark periods as she suffered from pancreatitis which affected her badly 2 times in last 8 years. One episode in 2007 nearly killed her and left her struggling for weeks to recover from the damage. This episode gave us a clear illustration of how dogs are said to mask their pain. She did not cry or whine….she just started blankly into space like she had had stroke . She did not respond to anyone or anything. She had IV Morphine and that helped the very bad days.
Some black and white photos taken in 2010
She developed arthritis in her rear legs and spine over the years. This made her slow in walking around in the last few years. She had pain and arthritis tablets to manage these ailments.
Whenever she had a arthritis tablet at $100 a tablet once a month…..in last 2-3 years she would amazingly spring back with much energy a few days later…like a puppy nearly…until it wore off after a month….then a another tablet.
Over last few years she developed cataracts in both eyes which did affect her night vision on walks and sometime in day time. However she still was highly observant of everything and she noted even minor changes to her environment……. even to her last minute of her life in 2015……
In 2013 – 2014 it was noted she had “trembling” in her front paws. This may have been a sign of old age. This continued over 2014 and was again put down to her age. Shadow used to like climbing stairs and would sometimes really rush up/down them with the result that she would end tripping up or falling down a stair. This tripping up we can assume damaged her nerves.
In August 2014 she sadly fell on the stairs as she came down from an upper level – falling about 2-3 steps …..around 30cm in height – and splattered very hard onto the pavers / ground, ending up with her paws stretched out. It was gut wrenching again to witness her in pain, like the pancreatitis issue, as she struggled to over the next few days to even just basically do a short walk around the house or stand.
What had happened was she damaged a neck joint and nerve. With this damage she struggled to walk well. With neck pain, nerve problems she had huge difficulty walking and mostly went nowhere as she rested and tried to overcome the inability of her feet to coordinate with her brain signals…
It was horrible and we did not believe she would recover but kept her alive in hope.
Here she is seen in September 2014 very slowly recovering from her stair fall and she looked very stiff at times and unhappy. She was on some very strong pain and arthritis medicine which we had to rotate due to the prolonged side affects of each tablet.
With this neck damage/ falling over situation not changing, it was very difficult by September 2014 to decide was her quality of life good enough to keep her alive.
She needed rest and she didnt know that…. but miracles can happen and by late November 2014 / early December 2015 she was not so much falling over and had regained her strength slowly to get back her main ability to walk and even run slightly.
It was wonderful to see her recover from a very dark episode again.
It was noted that in early 2015 she was becoming tired slowly…as she was approaching 98years in human terms or 14years in dog terms. She was struggling with jumping up onto lounges, cars seats or beds. This was a sign her rear legs were now becoming very sore and weak / losing strength.
Suddenly in late March/early April 2015 she started to act very different.
Over 2 weeks she began not eating her foods, couldn’t walk far, her breathing was limited and she was sleeping a lot of the day.
To show how quickly she deteriorated in April 2015 – here we see her on April 11 2015 in a car trip to shops. Happy, very observant and waiting for food. She looked healthy here.
Her condition worsened over April 2015 and by mid April 2015 she had lost 2.5kg and was struggling to eat even a small 5mm meatball for a whole day of food.
She was drinking water tho. She got too smart and realized that there were tablets hidden in the balls of mince she so loved and came for when the word *drug time* was called out.
Here we see the photos covering the last 2 weeks of her life in April 2015 with her around the house or in bed sleeping. Her not eating was really the only symptom of a problem. Her tiger face mat was her favourite one to cuddle up on or be wrapped up in winter with. As it became clear she was not well i tried to take more photos to record her memory for the future to look back at……
On 23 April 2015 she had a blood test to see what was possibly wrong and vet suggested maybe kidney issues. Shadows lower abdomen was an odd shape …indicating something was clearly wrong. The vet called back the same day with the blood results and was quite upset and surprised at how bad they were – she had developed suddenly a downhill slide due to multi organ failure with liver and kidney damage. These failures were releasing toxins into her body and they were essentially polluting and shutting down her body…..bit by bit.
The tough choice was then as she wasnt able to eat and drunk little…… what to do?. She still was not able to have pain medicine either as she wasnt swallowing her tablets.
THE DEATH OF SHADOW – April 24 2015 at 2.39pm
On the morning of 24 April 2015, the decision was taken to put her down later that afternoon. It was a gut wrenching decision and hard to do but she was in pain and wouldn’t be easily recovering in short term beyond a slight relief if she had a IV drip to flush her body out.
Photos below show her in early morning light 24 April 2015 – her last few hours alive.
Her kidney damage would be delayed slightly if a IV was used for a few weeks to filter the toxins out but they would return soon and be a repeat process……. Without eating she would suffer. So the hard choice was made and it was organised to have a vet and nurse arrive at 2.30pm to send her off peacefully and with dignity
Meanwhile for last day of her life …….she was sleeping, semi hungry and alert a few times. She greeted me when i came home from work by moving around…thus showing that she wasnt entirely too sick to say hello to me.
She decided or was finally able to eat some chicken and ham many after days of no or minimal food really and she also had a few licks of water around 2pm. She was happy to have this food and water. She felt somewhat refreshed.
With her passing looming, we brushed her fur coat one last time – this was something which she loved having done once a week – collecting some fur for a memento of her life. She was pattered, talked to and reassured.
Holding her paw / hand at 2.20pm
At 2.30pm the vet arrived and options were discussed one last time and we still decided to move ahead with putting her down humanely.
These photos are of her last 10 mins alive…I am sure she sensed something was right not only with her but with the situation….
Her last ever photo at 2.36pm — taken only 3 mins before her sad long permanent sleep and too soon death.
At 2.38pm the vet shaved her right upper leg and prepared the needle for injection….
At 2.39pm the injection of an overdose of anaesthetic started. She didnt like the needle going into her and she felt the first tiny bit of fluid i noted as i held her head and talked to her.
This overdose was designed to shut her entire body system down and she would be into a quick …….permanent long sleep. The overdose drug took maybe 10 seconds to run through her veins into her heart and brain which then at lightning speed shut her breathing off and closed down her brain and ……………….
She was dead.
I was and still am extremely startled at how quick of the drug did its work.
As the injection was taking place….I stroked her head and watched as within seconds she went from a breathing, conscious alert dog to……………. dead…..
Her own lasting memory will be for her own experience / record ………..was her eyes were wide open as she departed this world…. I can only hope she was happy to see me as her last sight….. and to know she had her family around her as she passed away so quickly.
MEMORY
Shadow was another one off dog that despite some questions around her early life…. went on to become a highly active, very intelligent, reliable and much loved dog. She was a dog that was able to do things when asked and showed affection back to humans.
How she will be remembered with her collar and some fur remains. The photos taken over years will also help continue her memories.
Her body is to be cremated and her ashes maybe scattered at her favourite location. Her good behaviours and friendly happy barking will be missed in the streets of northern Sydney.
Phil Buckley travels #3 